There are many reasons why people feel stress, and for some, how they are “seen” by others is extremely important to their self-worth, and deep down, to their soul. While others, who are more self-actualised, do not need external validation to feel good about themselves as parents and they are not stressed by what others maybe thinking and saying about them.
Recently I read an article by researchers from Ohio State University who reported that a survey of working mums who posted the most on Facebook, reported that they experienced more stress and depressive symptoms after 9 months of constant posting on Facebook about family activities, than those mums who posted less frequently.
The researchers found that the high posting group apparently felt their level of heightened stress and feeling depressed was associated with them seeking validation by their peers and others, as they had a strong need to be seen as a good parent.
Social media can be both a wonderful support tool and also a tool of destruction if people have fragile feelings of self-worth. The more the affected group posts, the more they feel they have to be perfect and what they DO for their kids and HAVE in giving gifts to their children, will have them “seen” as good parents. It’s a never ending treadmill, post, post, post …
Many years ago our great friend and mentor Charles “Tremendous” Jones was staying with us in our Brisbane home on one of his many speaking tours ‘Downunder’. He shared with me a great de-stress tool. Charlie said…” a great way to stay at peace and be calm is to go about the business of minding your own business”. He explained that as long as you do your best at being a good loving parent, then that is enough. It’s about your BEING in life that is so important. You don’t have to tell others what you have done.
For those who spend a lot of time posting on Facebook, maybe most of this time could be spent instead by just BEING with their kids.
If you would like to immerse yourself in two days of creating your own unique Stress Management Toolkit with tools and strategies that build your resilience and lead you to the calm, then join us in Brisbane on 13 & 14 August for the Stress to Strength Experience Workshop. We have a fantastic team of qualified Stress Management Practitioners who will guide and mentor you through the processes. Plus, you’ll have lots of fun and go home relaxed and de-stressed.
THE EARLY BIRD registration is still open.
To join us, register at www.stresstostrength.com/experience/